The Birth of a Quasel
We have thought long and hard about whether it is appropriate to let you witness one of the most intimate moments known to humankind: the birth of a Quasel.
For a limited time only, and in order to gauge the reaction of the general public, this page allows you to follow the entire process from first inspiration to public release, step by step.
Be warned: this is not for the faint-hearted. Return to your teddy bear if you feel at all unsure. Otherwise, prepare yourself for a life-changing experience — particularly for the Quasel.
Please remain quiet.
The artist is currently attempting to observe a wild Quasel. Sudden noises, flash photography and scepticism may cause it to disappear.
1. Inspiration
Contrary to popular belief, Quasels are not invented. They already exist. Everywhere.
The universe is filled with Quasels drifting quietly through the ether. The difficulty lies not in creating them, but in spotting them. This requires a delicate balance of electrical, gravitational and inspirational fields, together with a comfortable chair and a considerable amount of staring into empty space.
Eventually, if conditions are just right, a Quasel will reveal itself.
At that point, the artist must act quickly. Quasels have an annoying tendency to disappear again just as he reaches for his pencil.
2. Capturing
At this point, it is essential not to disturb the configuration of the surrounding fields. The moment a Quasel suspects it is being observed, it's lost.
The professional artist pretends to be merely deciding what to have for dinner. He casually picks up his pencil and, without attracting attention, captures the Quasel's outline and rough shape.
Most importantly, he memorises the exact over-under pattern. This is the Quasel's topology and must never change. If possible, he also notes its texture and natural habitat for the later stages of preservation.
In any case, he must work swiftly, as the moment is fleeting.
3. Topology
With the Quasel already drifting away into another realm, the artist challenges his short-term memory to reconstruct the precise arrangement of its tangles. He fixes every over-under crossing permanently, using utmost concentration and a reliable, non-leaking ink pen.
Once the topology has been secured, he gently removes the remaining pencil traces with a rubber.
The Quasel is now ready for the next critical stage.
4. Defining colours
With the topology safely preserved, the artist can finally turn to the Quasel's colour scheme. This is no trivial matter. Every shade must be recalled down to a micro-RAL to ensure complete chromatic authenticity.
Experienced artists know the consequences of getting this wrong. An inaccurate colour assignment may be regarded as deeply offensive by the Quasel community and could lead to accusations of artistic misrepresentation.
After all, colours have feelings too, and none of them wishes to be chosen by mistake.
5. Preservation of texture and habitat
With the Quasel safely recorded on paper, the artist can now concentrate on preserving its texture and natural habitat. This is where modern technology becomes invaluable.
With the support of an advanced preservation assistant, the artist painstakingly recreates every surface, every reflection and every environmental detail remembered from the original encounter. Throughout this process, the Quasel's topology remains untouchable. No strand may be rerouted. No eye may appear or disappear. The assistant is free to improve the realism of the reconstruction, but never the Quasel itself.
The artist supervises every stage with great care.
6. Final quality check
Despite remarkable technical abilities, preservation assistants have occasionally been known to become rather imaginative. Such behaviour is firmly discouraged. Nevertheless, a final inspection is always carried out to ensure that every strand remains exactly where the artist intended it.
One final and extremely responsible task now awaits the slightly nervous artist. He must count the number of shapes and eyes personally. Any mistake at this stage may result in severe embarrassment and, in extreme cases, long-lasting counting trauma.
7. A new Quasel is born.
After passing its final inspection, the Quasel is finally ready to leave the artist's studio and enter the Museum.
There it will spend the rest of its life confusing visitors, challenging artificial intelligence and patiently waiting for someone to count it correctly.
